Daycare

I had to get this off my chest after lots of tears and sleepless nights...

While I am usually ecstatic about this time of year...school letting out and summer beginning...I am feeling very sad about the beginning of summer this year. To me, it means that my days home with Jack are coming to a close, faster that I even thought it would.

I know that finding just the right daycare is hard for any mom, and leaving your baby is hard for any mom, but I feel even more stress and strain because of Jack's medical concerns. It is going to be hard to find someone that will take Jack with his g-tube and continuous feedings, and even harder for me to trust someone to take care of Jack and all that comes with him.

My mom sent myself and my brother and sister to a home daycare when she was working while were little. We went to the best daycare ever! Retta's house. It was actually Loretta, but I couldn't say my "L's". I remember playing with the other kids, being outside, helping take care of the babies, doing special craft projects, reading books, going on walks and bike rides, going to the pool in the summer, and healthy, homemade lunches and snacks. We were always busy and and I remember it being such a caring, loving and fun environment. We became very close with Loretta and her family and are still are till this day. I believe that's where my brother and I were dropped off to when my sister was born! Her whole family took care of us and her kids even babysat us on the weekends when my parents had to be gone. As I grew up, I would go over to Loretta's after school and help out with the little kids. Eventually, I began babysitting Loretta's grand kids and many of the other daycare kids.

Now I am on the search for my own "Retta" for Jack. Somewhere I know he will be safe, cared for with love, fed healthy meals and snack, be read to, get fresh air, have interaction with other kids, and be given new, nurturing experiences in a warm and homey environment. After seeing a few places, I feel like maybe I'm asking for too much. Maybe my mom got lucky in finding such and amazing family to take care of us while she was working. But I will keep looking, I have only just begun!

But while I am searching, I am going to enjoy every single minute that I have left with my little man. I don't care if the laundry isn't done, or the kitchen is dirty, or there are weeds in my garden. I don't care if I miss shows on TV or my hair doesn't get done. I just want to soak up all the "Jack" I can in these final months of being home with favorite little person on the planet. I am going to fill our summer with days of swinging, picnics in the park, swimming, zoo trips and play dates. And I am going to take advantage of every rainy, cuddly, nap-in-my-arms kind of day that comes along as well.

I feel better know, maybe I will be able to sleep tonight, and if you know of any great daycare's in the area, let me know!

  

Double Digits

Wow! Where does the time go? Jack Matthew, you are ten months old! It was just yesterday when you were ten weeks old in the little old place we called the NICU! At ten months old, you have been through more in your life than I have ever imagined, however you are still oblivious to it all. You have an amazing spirit about you and are happier than anyone could ever imagine! There are not enough hours in the day or days in the week to spend with you and I am relishing every moment of your life.

Here is a little about you at ten months old...

Some swing action and fresh air!

First wagon ride with the neighbor!

Toast, it's what's for dinner.

What a guy!

Best Mother's Day ever!

Another day at the park.

My boys, another day watching the neighborhood from the front window.

Our first trip to the zoo together! Very humid in Africa apparently!

Dressed up for family dinner at Verucchi's!

Getting chunky from goldfish and pasta, yum!

• You had a hospital stay of two nights for IV fluids and it was the worst thing ever, but I never left your side.
• You started to eat finger food and you LOVE it! You are quite the little chow hound loving toast and gold fish the most, puffs are a favorite too. I put olive oil on anything I can to give you more fat and try to feed you the fattiest foods possible. You still need a little chunking up weighing in at 16 lbs 11 oz last weight check.
• You still take two naps a day. We are finally on a schedule...you wake up about 6:30 an go down for a nap about 9:30-11:00, then take an afternoon nap from about 2:00-4:00. We are very flexible about your naps. You sleep where ever you and when ever you are tired,
• You love to swing outside! I stared taking you to various parks around town when we are out running errands as your reward for being such a good errand runner with me.
• We are looking for daycare...boo! I still keep playing the lottery, so there still is a chance that I may get to stay home with you.
• You follow the dog everywhere! You stretch your neck just to see him and you especially love it when he shakes and scratches his ears...it makes you giggle!
• Everyone, and I mean everyone, comments on your red hair and big eyes!
• They also think you are big for your age! Shocker!
• You can stand all by yourself when you hold on to something. You stand in front of the window in the morning and you and Cooper watch the neighborhood wake up. You two are going to be great buddies.
• You still have no teeth, but EVERYTHING goes in your mouth!
• You just started to give kisses when mommy asks for one. They are open mouthed and slobbery, but I LOVE them and make you do it a hundred times a day! It amazes me that you can comprehend something! You are getting so smart!
• You are not so much into reading books right now, but would rather eat them.
• You wear 9 month clothes, but all of your warm weather clothes are 12 months...so grow please, they are really cute!
• You are long! You are going to be one tall string bean of a boy!
• I still rock you to sleep, but you are not that into it lately. You would rather play with the quilt on the rocking chair or my face and glasses. I can put you into your crib and you go right to sleep.
• You are off of your tube for four hours now! It's amazing! I can't wait until out next doctor appointment to see if you get another hour off. You are doing so well right now and I'm so proud of you!
• You are not crawling yet, but you can kind of scootch backwards. I will not be surprised if you skip crawling and go right to walking.
• You are amazingly happy and giggly. You laugh with your belly like Santa.
• You are going to say something profound any day now. You say consonants with your paci in your mouth. Lot's of "ga ga" and lot's of grunting. It's pretty funny!
• We took you to the Brookfield Zoo for your first time, they monkey house, and got you a gorilla Mold-A-Rama!
• You are going to the doctor a lot less now. April was a rough month, but you are back on track. The neurologist said that he will discharge you in the fall! 
• You have found your tube and love to chew on it! You bite so hard it kinks and alarms. It's a good thing you don't have teeth yet because you would bite right through that thing!

A First Easter

Every holiday is a first lately and with that brings family traditions. I don't think Matt and I have ever colored eggs together, but we started this year! Even though we did it after Jack went to bed, we did start this new family tradition of coloring eggs. It's so nice to reminisce with Matt about how his family did things and how mine did and then combine those traditions to make our own, new one! We talked about the big heavy mugs our family used to color eggs, how there were only about six colors (our kit had nine), the shrinky egg wrappers, and using crayons on eggs. We had a great time and I plan on introducing egg yolk to Jack with all of these eggs we have lying around!

There were too many colors to choose from! We had to boil more eggs so we could use them all!

Daddy and Jack's eggs.

Even Cooper got his own Easter egg!

Easter Sunday came and the bunny came to our house for Jack and Matt...but he seemed to have misplaced my Easter basket this year! We spent the morning indulging in candy, which Matt gave up for Lent, and Diet Coke, which I gave up for Lent. Jack enjoyed playing with all of his new toys and books and I was very excited to put him in his Easter finest.  Unfortunately, this was the morning that Jack's GI system seemed to begin to go wild. I stayed home from church to watch him and see if we could partake in the rest of the days festivities. He seemed fine, very happy, so we had a quick visit with my parents then off to Matt's grandparents house for Easter dinner. A quick stop at his parent's house on the way home, then home to spend a little time outside before putting Jack to bed. Phew, it was a long day. The holidays are great and always family filled, but they are also filled with so much running around. I'm hoping that Matt and I will start some new traditions in the near future that require a lot less time in the car and running around. It's special days like these that I want to remember and cherish forever...soon Easter will be filled with egg hunts, bubbles and kites and I want there to be plenty of time enjoy the childhood splendor that comes with holidays! I do not have any pictures of Jack in his studly Easter outfit because he had a blowout before I could take a picture! But I plan on dressing him up in his little plaid dress shirt sometime soon to "re-enact" him in his Easter finest!

Our Easter baskets. Thank you Matt for sharing!

Feeling overwhelmed with lots of new stuff to figure out!

I don't think he really liked the ears. Matt said this reminded him of when Ralphie tried on the rabbit jammies on "The Christmas Story"!

This was our Easter Bunny!

A little swinging after the festivities were over. He really loves the swing!

I hope all of you had a wonderful Easter Sunday and remembered that miracles really do happen!

A Little Update

Well we have been busy, busy, busy around here lately doing some fun stuff and some not-so-fun stuff.

Once again, my dear little Jack got sick. I feel like he has spent most all of April sick and it's driving me crazy. It is so hard to sit back and watch my little one be so sick and fade away to nothing. After many phone calls with Jack's doctors, he was admitted to the hospital for IV fluids and some lab work. He was so dehydrated and lethargic and his little eyes were sunken. I could tell when I held him that he had lost a considerable amount of weight, and he did. It was very hard for the nurses to get an IV in him because of the dehydration, but after almost four hours, fluids were started. Being in the hospital brings back so many feelings and worries. After two sleepless night and lots of conversations with out doctors, we got to go home. Oh home sweet home, how I missed you so, and I think Jack did too! The doctors again chalked this up to a virus, even though it was the third time he had had these symptoms. Yes, I'm still questioning this but, Jack is back to himself and is rapidly gaining weight...16lbs 10oz this morning, down only 2oz from his heaviest weight, yea! I took Jack to the park on our way home from the doctor to celebrate! We see out GI doctor later this week and I am hoping for another hour off of the tube, so please keep your fingers crossed for us!

After we recovered from our short hospital stay, we enjoyed some time outdoors. We spent all day Saturday outside starting with a hike, washing and waxing cars (thank you Matt) planting flowers, napping, swinging, and grilling out. It was a great, full day.

Even though we go hiking at Starved Rock and Mathesian on a fairly regular basis, it amazes me that we can always find new, beautiful things to enjoy!

I was looking for bluebells, but found this Jack-in-the-pulpit!

With my babies!

We spent most of Sunday at our local March of Dimes Walk and I even convinced Matt to go with Jack and I. We did not walk this year, but volunteered instead. It was so nice to be at the walk and be able to share Jack's story with some of the March of Dimes board members and volunteers and to see people that we knew. It's great to see all of those people come together for one common cause. I hope to be able to help out and be involved with some of the March of Dimes events in the future. It really felt great to help out a cause that is so close to my heart. I spent all day thinking about all of the other babies that we got to know in the NICU, their stories, our nurses and doctors, and the babies that are in the NICU now. It was a beautiful day and our faces show the signs of wind and sun burn. Note: Remember to put sunscreen in the diaper bag!

Jack as Bono.

Daddy and Jack at March for Babies.

Our job was to put purple bracelets on all of the March of Dimes walkers. We also helped with the memory wall.

All of the walkers and teams at the IV YMCA just before taking off for the 3 mile walk.

I love spring so much...the colors are so vibrant and the smells of blooming flowers and fresh cut grass are looming in the air. My neighbor has the most beautiful garden that she is able to keep blooming from early spring to late fall. There is always beautiful color at her house, so I decided to take advantage of it and use it for a photo shoot. I have a few other places that I have scoped out around town for some great photos...there is nothing I love more than babies and flowers!

Our neighbors lovely tulips and flowering tree.

Being Mr. Inquisitive with a leaf.

I think I have been inspired to plant some bulbs in the fall.

I love spring...

...and this happy little boy!

I hope all of you are enjoying spring at your house as much as we are here!